Wheeling Steel Appoints Jones To Head Pittsville Foundries

Exhibit shows the many variations possible when crafting a basic headline, and the pitfalls of writing a head that tells too much or too little.

The headline you provide won't necessarily be used. Usually edi­tors will write a headline to fit their own specifications, so the sample is primarily a means of suggesting the important point of the story. If no headline is provided, leave approximately one-fourth of the page blank to allow the editor to write one right at the top of the release. Often the decision on whether or not to use a marginally newsworthy release is simply the ease with which it can be processed by the editor.

 

Headlines look so simple sitting atop their stories. That is, they do if they are written well. Achieving both clarity and simplicity takes practice, however. One way to simplify the task is to offer a one-line headline:

Health Fairs to Explain Benefits

That does the job of catching the editor's attention and summarizing the main point of the release. It also doesn't look much like the head­line the editor is likely to use on a story that runs one or two columns wide in a newspaper. So, if you have the time and patience, you'll try to offer a multi-line head similar to those used by the news media.

Here are some tries by various members of a public relations class, along with the instructor's comments:

Annual Health Fair to Benefit Boeing Employees

(Lines should be more balanced in length. "Benefit" is used in a different way from the body of the story, which talks about "employee benefits." Head sounds too general, and the word "annual" makes it mundane.)

Health Fairs to Be Held At Local Boeing Plants

(Acceptable, but ho-hum. "To be held" is an uninspired verb form that doesn't involve anyone.)

Boeing Employees to Explore Health Benefits at Fairs

(This one fits the model of the classic headline: noun and verb in the first line, and an explanatory phrase in the second line. "Employees explore" is active. Clear and concise.)

Alternate Health Plan For Boeing Employees

(Called a "label" head because it has no noun or verb. The story mentions alternatives to the standard health plan, but that fact is too complicated to be understood in a headline.)

Employee Benefits Department to Sponsor Health Info Fairs at Boeing Plants

(Too much information to absorb—heads should be brief. Focuses on the department rather than the employee—on the sender of the mes­sage instead of the audience for the message. "Sponsor" is an uninter­esting verb.)

Boeing Health Fairs to Help Employees in Making Choices

(Nice try, but ends up being unspecific, and it's complicated to read and retain the message. "Fairs/help" is a strange noun-verb combination.)

Boeing to Hold Health Fairs To Enlighten Its Employees

(Well-meaning, but puts the emphasis on the company's action and sounds condescending toward the employees. For all the verbiage, it doesn't get at the angle of employees making choices.)

Boeing Plants to Hold Health Fair

(Bare-bones. Splitting of verb between lines is a no-no, as would be a preposition at the end of the line. An editor might have to settle for this if the story called for a small one-column-wide head. But for the news release to carry such a condensed headline would be counterproductive.)

Come One, Come All to the Boeing Employee Benefits Health Fairs!

(Restrain yourself: public relations isn't the same as advertising. Cut the ballyhoo.)

Dateline

Start the story with a so-called "dateline" which, in most cases today, no longer carries a date as it did a century ago when news traveled slowly. The dateline today usually carries the name of the place where the release originates. (Note that the Neptune Swim Club release did not carry the optional dateline.)

While many newspapers will move the name of the town into the body of the story, others still prefer a dateline. Some organizations use boldface to highlight names of towns mentioned throughout the arti­cle—Green Bay, for example—not because they will appear that way in final print, but in order to highlight them for editors who skim through looking for local names and places. You can even re-fold a release and mark town names with color so that a mention of Belleville on the sec­ond page of a list of appointments or awards will jump right out at the editor of the weekly Belleville Bugle.

 

Slugline, Continuations, and End Sign

Standard newspaper copyediting marks and symbols should be used throughout. Follow the Associated Press style manual.

If a release runs more than one page, the word "more" should ap­pear at the bottom of each page except the last. An end sign such as "30" or "#" indicates that there are no more pages.

The second and successive pages should be "slugged" at the top in the following manner:

PROMOTIONS—add one, or PROMOTIONS—2 PROMOTIONS—add two, or PROMOTIONS—3

The slug word ("Promotions," in this case) is selected from the first paragraph of the story and keys the most important aspect to the news. These journalistic conventions signal that you are "playing the game" and that you know what the editor wants.

The following news releases (on pages 92-93 and page 112 book) provide models to fol­low. Before we look at them, however, it is important to understand the roles and functions of three key parts of any release: the lead, the main quote, and the "boilerplate" paragraph.

 

The Summary Lead

Imagine you had just run the marathon and you were asked to explain your company's plans to open a new plant to make a new product. Knowing you had the breath for maybe fifty words, you'd make sure every syllable counted. That's the task the writer faces when drafting the first paragraph—the lead—of a news release. If the editor, and by extension the target audience member, isn't clear about what the story involves and why it is important after the first paragraph, the subse­quent paragraphs will never be read.

(You must realize, too, that even though you send out a three-page news release, the editor may deem the story worth only a single para­graph in a "round-up" of similar news items. That single paragraph that makes it into print will be your lead. So, you have to write the lead with the objective of making it a story that can stand alone.)

 

Handling Quotes

As we have seen from some of the examples of leads, quotes from author­itative persons are important elements of a news release. A short release containing routine material may not call for quotes. But when the subject is a new product or service, an organization's stand on an issue, or your company's response to changes in the marketplace, quoted material from your chief executive officer or another spokesperson can dramatize and emphasize ideas much more effectively than a recitation of informa­tion or data.                                   

In fact, quotes permit you to inject passion and opinion into a release that otherwise must be "factual" in order to appeal to the editor as "news." Putting quote marks around ideas and attributing them to a spokesperson enables you to state your organization's view unabashedly and with vigor.

You may be able to take quotes from statements the leaders of your organization have made in public or at meetings within the organiza­tion. More likely, however, it is the responsibility of the public relations people to sift through the opinions, ideas, statements, records, and re­ports of management, then create the neat, pithy quotes that will appear in the news release. Once these "quotes" are crafted, they are shown to management in the form of news release drafts, for approval or rewritings or suggestions or questions from the intended speakers of the quotes. Through a process of internal negotiation, the exact text of the final quote as it will appear in the release is worked out. If the public relations people are persuasive and good listeners, the resulting quotes will be efficient and effective reflections of management's opinions— in a form that the ordinary reader can understand and believe.

Quotes rarely serve as the lead paragraph. Editors consider it a gimmick. They prefer a summary lead that sets the context. The second paragraph is the most likely position for displaying the potent quote. If considerable contextual information is necessary to set the stage, the quote may not fit in before the third or fourth paragraph.

Follow newspaper style for the quote: Open with quote marks, then end the first sentence of quote with an attribution. Usually the attribu­tion is "said," unless a more descriptive verb is appropriate (de­manded... suggested... asked...).

 

" We do not think the time has come for higher taxes, " Mayor Jones said, " but we are willing to listen to all views. "

Acme president Smith said he would support the council. “ If merchants in Peoria don't stand together, the whole city will fail, " he said.

" The fate of the urban renewal program is in our hands, " said Coalition 2000 chairman Ray Brown. " If we don't do it, who will?"

 

Restrain yourself from using more than a short sentence or two of quoted material. Paraphrase continued thoughts: Brown said he has the support of 200 other members of the Chamber of Commerce. Quotes are like icing on a cake: a small amount is sweet and rewarding; too much and you begin to choke.

Apply the "read-aloud" test: Quotes should look good to the eye, but read them aloud to make sure that they sound like something your CEO or spokesperson really could and would say in a television inter­view or a speech. Readers can detect when a quote sounds phony or contrived. The best quotes read well and simultaneously transport the attitude your organization wants to cultivate.

 

Feature Style

Journalists talk about "straight news style," meaning unbiased infor­mation presented straightforwardly using the summary lead to open the story and the classic inverted pyramid organizational structure with facts presented in descending order of importance.

On the other hand, "feature style" treatment is considered appro­priate for news about trends, interesting people, and product informa­tion that is part of a marketing public relations campaign.

 

"Teasers" are one kind of feature lead, and sometimes they take the form of a question:

Why is John Milgram moving for the third time in three years... and why has his family decided to stay behind this time? (Article on special real estate services for corporate and military personnel.)

 

A salad with seventeen ingredients, including not only lettuce and other greens but fruit, meat, and cheese as well That' s what you'd have to eat for every meal if you followed your doctor's advice while dieting. (Article about a new weight-loss program that provides all basic nutrients in a "liquid salad. ")

 

"Suspended interest" feature leads tell a story in chronological order:

Mary Angelinas was on time, as usual. Her car pulled out of the driveway exactly at 8 and she was on the freeway headed for Center City by 8:10. The deejay on the radio kept her mind off all distractions... including the slight pain in her chest. (Article about heart attacks in working women, sponsored by a pharmaceutical company.)

 

Marketing public relations features often speak directly to the reader in order to involve him or her with the information:

Let's face it, you have better things to do with your time than remodel the entire house. But try getting a tradesman to work for you on the weekend when you can be home to supervise the painting, carpentry and plumbing. (Fea­ture on do-it-yourself remodeling shortcuts, sponsored by a home improvement products company.)

 

' Every year you vow to "try something new" for holiday peals. But then your family requests all the traditional fare: turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, and pies for dessert. This year you can have your cake (or creamed onions) and eat it too. New recipes and menus developed by General Foods art fully blend something new and something old for your festive table.

 

Feature treatment usually makes liberal use of quotes, as well as lists, charts, and other items that make the information more interest­ing and useful to the reader. Use of a spokesperson—such as home re­pair expert Bob Villa for Sears, or home decorator and party planner Martha Stewart for K mart—allows for feature releases written in the speaking style of the personality associated with the product or ser­vice. Articles may even be written in the first person and carry the by­line of the expert spokesperson.

The family living section of the newspaper welcomes feature treat­ment. Nationally distributed features sometimes come with a list of suggestions for ways the editor can localize the story by adding infor­mation from area businesses or personalities. The public relations agencies that package such features are more than happy if columnists or editors absorb the information (and the feature writing style) into their own columns or features, since that adds extra credibility to the information being placed.

The public relations department or agency is fortunate if a news re­lease is used in its entirety. Often several news releases from various organizations are combined by the editor into one piece. The mention of your organization may be brief and at the end, instead of lengthy and high in the article as you envisioned it. That's the tradeoff for get­ting "free" publicity.

Many times you can enhance the placement of your news release by actually offering more information—or at least information that is broken into more than one news release. We'll see now how the sidebar and the press kit can increase your chances of getting a news release placed.

 

Sidebars

Editors use the term "sidebar" to refer to a shorter article that appears alongside the main article and offers greater detail about one aspect of the main piece. Good reporters learn to think while they are writing an article: "Would this information stand out better in a sidebar?" Stop and think about how you look at spreads in a newspaper or magazine: often the information in a sidebar is so interesting that it convinces you to go back and read the main article. In other words, sidebars are not afterthoughts—they can and should be the best information in the arti­cle.

Suppose you are planning a new product release. You have enough material to provide three, four, or five pages of information. What would you break out into a sidebar?

• A list of special applications of the product.

• A history of advancements and developments that preceded this product.

• Comments from researchers, testers, and trial users of the product.

• You are announcing the centennial of your organization—one hun­dred years of serving the community. Sidebars to the main article might include:

• A capsule history, with major events and the dates they oc­curred.

• Profiles of the major leaders of the organization in the first century.

• Statements of congratulation from other groups in the com­munity.

• Statistical information about the number of individuals who have been involved in the organization over the first century.

 

Your organization has announced that it will support legislation to protect the environment from air and water pollution. Think of these sidebars:

• A list of other organizations supporting the same legislation.

• Major pollution events in the history of the area that led to sup­port for the current legislation.

• A breakdown of costs for cleanups from past pollution events.

Sidebars are a mindset. Effective public relations practitioners who know from experience how complicated a multi-page news release can be (and how reluctant readers are to wade through long articles) think instinctively: "What information can I put into a sidebar in order to make the story more attractive to the editor and to my target publics?"

 

Brochures and Direct Mail

Now we look at the fact sheet and its fancier cousin, the brochure, in the context of direct mail as the delivery system. In the past decade, direct mail—sometimes called direct advertising—has risen to become the third largest marketing medium, right behind newspapers and television. Its phenomenal growth can be attributed to the fact that direct mail targets specific publics and reaches them at the time and in the place where they make most of their decisions—in the home. That makes direct mail an extremely attractive message channel for public re­lations programs.

Advertising, promotions, posters, displays, and special events are used to alert the public to ideas and programs. Brochures and fact sheets are designed to go into greater detail about the issue. They provide infor­mation that can be saved, stored, referred to, and acted upon.

The mailing list is one of the most valuable tools a PR department can use. The mass media deliver thousands of unwanted members of sub-publics that do not interest your organization. But mailing lists target much more precisely the audience you want to reach: home owners, apartment dwellers, boating enthusiasts, hunters, coin collectors, reg­istered voters, users of credit cards, opera patrons, senior citizens, sup­porters of gun control, opponents of gun control, conservationists, and left-handed bowlers.

Some mailing lists cost thousands of dollars, especially those that identify high-income families with special characteristics. Other lists can be bought more cheaply from magazines aimed at hobbyists or re­gional audiences. Many organizations, such as non-competing arts and cultural organizations, routinely exchange mailing lists at no cost to ei­ther organization. Commercial direct-mail houses, for a handsome fee, will take care of everything from obtaining the appropriate mailing lists to stuffing and mailing the envelopes for you.

Of course, any organization should carefully develop its own mail­ing lists by making sure that every person participating in an event sponsored by the organization, every citizen who writes the organization for information, every contributor, every customer, every personal friend of management, every elected official is put in a card file or on a computer list to receive mailings that fall in his or her interest areas.

Now let's look at formats that will deliver your messages effectively and discuss how they are produced.

 

Varied Names

The range of names for direct-mail items suggests the variety that is possible: circulars, folders, booklets, pamphlets, monographs, tracts, catalogs, packets, portfolios, bulletins, broadsheets, manifestos— not to mention pseudo-magazines, pseudo-newspapers, and pseudo-newsletters. Because so many of these terms are associated with the hoopla of marketing and promotion, public relations practitioners working for government departments, public utilities, and regulated industries often prefer to use the more dignified term "fact sheet" to identify any printed matter that provides background information about the organization and/or one of its projects. Some examples of fact sheets:

• The state government of South Dakota distributes a four-page brochure at meetings of senior citizens to describe a special phone service that enables the elderly to call the state capital on a no-charge 800 number for information about Social Security benefits, consumer fraud, homemaker services, taxes, Medi­care, and legal services. As shown in Exhibit 11.2, included with the brochure are a wallet card and a gummed sticker so that the number can be affixed to the telephone.

• Branches of the armed services issue fact sheets in convenient, three-hole-punched, looseleaf format, on such varied topics as "The Chaplain Service" and "Burial in a National Cemetery."

• The National Bureau of Standards issues regular bulletins on the progress of research and development on such projects as cardiac pacemaker batteries, natural gas pipelines, and resistivity stan­dards for silicon power devices.

• Federal and state health agencies, as well as hospitals, health-maintenance organizations, professional medical organizations, and insurance companies, offer printed material on every dis­ease, physical ailment, or mental problem imaginable.

Common Formats

The format you decide on depends upon the needs of the occasion, the creativity of the PR department, and, of course, the size of the budget.

Because the standard "legal-size" mailing envelope is approxi­mately 41/4 by 9 1/2 inches and the most common precut sheet size used in duplicating and quick-print processes is 8 1/2 by 11 inches, it is not surprising that the most popular mailer is what printers call a "two­fold folder" consisting of six panels, each 3 3/8 inches wide and 8 1/2 inches high. When a standard printing press and the standard 23-by-45-inch paper stock are used, a printer can neatly fit ten such brochures per sheet with a minimal loss of paper through trimming.

A common variation is the four-panel, single-fold brochure. An­other configuration favored by the travel business is the 8.5-by-22-inch sheet, which appears to be the standard six-panel format until it is fully opened to reveal a "poster-sized" inside spread. Still another option is the two-fold, six-panel folder with one of the end panels "trimmed to as little as 1.5 inches so that it forms a "teaser" flap that partly overlaps another page. Price information or copy that intrigues the readers enough so that they will continue reading inside, might be placed on this small surface.

Typically, the right-hand panel on one side of the 8.5-by-ll sheet is designed as the cover. The left-hand panel on the same side of the sheet folds around to become the second panel seen by the reader after open­ing the cover. The middle panel of the same side of the sheet thus be­comes the "back" side. Because it occupies the least advantageous position, it may be used for supplementary information. Or it may be left blank, except for a return-address section, so that the brochure can be mailed without an envelope.

 

The three panels on the reverse side of the sheet read in one of three ways:

• As a single "poster" spread.

• As a left-hand single page seen first in conjunction with the in­side cover flap, then in conjunction with a two-panel spread at center-right.

• As three separate and individual panels reading left to right.

 

The decision, of course, depends on the amount of information, the personality of the design, and whether or not you want the information to be presented in a linear or random fashion.

When the object is to keep the cost down to between five and fif­teen cents per brochure, and to present the reader with a familiar arti­fact, the formats above work best.

If you wish to intrigue the reader or achieve a lavish feeling with your message, you may decide to work with a printer to develop a non-standard format. A particularly intriguing, if expensive, format is the standard two-fold brochure with an extra flap glued on the right-hand inside panel to form a pocket that holds a sheaf of single sheets in varied heights and colors.

The single-sheet, unfolded broadside is preferable for meeting an­nouncements, grand openings, sale promotions, and handbills to be passed out at rallies. The uncomplicated format suggests a certain di­rectness, urgency, and lack of pretense. Conversely, any multi-page for­mat that is glued, stitched, or stapled at the back becomes a booklet and has a sense of permanency. Having attracted an audience to a meeting with handbills, you might then put a durable pamphlet into their hands for more careful consideration.

Arranging information for multi-panel presentation creates many de­sign situations that don't occur when you're dealing with the single rectangle of the poster or advertisement. If the brochure is to be dis­seminated from a rack or holder where it shares space with similar messages, the front cover must be arranged with the title or "teaser" on the top third of the front panel—just as magazine cover designers have to put intriguing information at the top, where it can be seen peeking out over its competitors for attention. While the cover should be unique in some respect, the designer cannot forget that it must be related stylistically to the remaining panels through consistent use of a related type and art materials.

Organizing the text presents another challenge. Essentially, you write the copy to make a complete message in linear form, as for a news release or a feature article. Then it must be divided into suitable segments for each panel. Key sentences should be highlighted by plac­ing them in display type instead of regular text. Care must be taken to keep the presentation balanced, with approximately the same number of titles or headlines on each panel, or a multi-panel over-line holding the text together.

 

Selecting the Art

Depending on how many appeals or how many examples you want to provide in one publication, you may decide to use several small pieces of art—line drawings or photos—or you may feel that the impact of a single picture will carry the entire message. For a leaflet decrying the fact that many unwanted pets must be put to death each year because nobody will adopt them, the startling statistic ("One out of three cats in Ourtown will be 'put to sleep' this year") might be most effective if re­versed (light lettering over dark image) and placed right over the pic­ture of a cute, furry little kitten.

Will you need to include a coupon, so that the reader can request more information or mail in a contribution? Ideally, it should be on a separate slip of paper so that the main message will not be mutilated once the coupon is removed. Make sure that the type, the art, and the slogan of the main brochure are echoed on the insert. That way they will relate stylistically when they are together, but each also can stand alone. If the budget dictates that the coupon must be torn from the brochure, put it on the flap farthest from the cover, and make sure no important information is removed from the main message when the coupon is torn out.

 

Some Do's and Don'ts

There may always be good reasons for ignoring accepted rules and practices of design. Nonetheless, the following advice can spare you considerable trial and error:

• Resist the temptation to design an entire brochure so that it reads sideways—that is, so that the 8.5-inch measure is the width and the pages are flipped from the bottom. The format is useful when you must present statistical information in tables that are wide because there are many columns of figures. But, ordinarily, it is perceived as "odd" and rather annoying. Never mix horizontal and vertical makeup if you want the reader to get all the way through the multipanel layout.

• Don't tilt the main title on the cover panel ninety degrees, un­less it is one or two simple and easy-to-recognize words such as "We need you" or "Go Navy!" A complex title such as "Ten Rea­sons Why You Must Support Land Reform" should be run in or­thodox fashion. At most, tip it at a thirty-degree angle if a bit of excitement is desired.

• The information on the cover should either intrigue the reader or clearly label the topic of the contents. The development of the concept begins through the text that is inside. Usually, the cover is most effective if it is approximately one-third type and two-thirds illustration or visual relief (white space). Sometimes, of course, impact is achieved by totally filling the cover space with super-sized type that boldly confronts the reader: "The five min­utes you spend reading this pamphlet could save your life!"

• Some element on each and every panel should "pull" the reader on from the previous panel: an illustration, a headline, a boxed item, a statistical table, or a variation in the layout. Reading an all-text message is hard work; the reader needs incentive.

• Strive for equilibrium. A brochure should not be top-heavy, bottom-heavy, right- or left-heavy, front-loaded, or crammed at the back. If your only copy adds up to the equivalent of three pages of text, use white space and wider margins in order to spread it out evenly. Avoid the device of dumping a gratuitous piece of art in at the end in order to fill.

• Is this one of a "family" of messages from your organization? If so, don't forget to use devices that will make the family resem­blance obvious: the organization's logo and slogan, distinctive color or border devices, and familiar typefaces.

• Liven the presentation with separate boxed or bordered items such as maps, directions, "how-to" explanations, and lists. A brochure is supposed to have a longer lifetime than other mes­sages. Nothing assures longevity more than the inclusion of vi­tal information that the recipients realize they may need to use at a later date.

• The question-and-answer format never seems to outlive its use­fulness. It is just about the simplest and most recognizable way to draw the reader in to the material. It is especially effective when the Q. lines appear in larger or bolder type. Questions should be written in an intriguing, punchy style, with a "What if?" or "How come?" aspect that the reader absolutely must re­solve before going on. The Q&A format may fall flat, however, when the questions are loaded or petty. ("Why don't the con­servatives care about the little man?")

• If you can afford to spend a bit more, spot color will dress up.a brochure—unless you splotch it around with wild abandon. Try using a dark-blue ink throughout for instance; render.a title in red for emphasis; or obtain a shading effect by having the printer back one entire panel with a halftone screen to give the brochure extra snap. Restraint and good taste arc usually preferable to gratuitous excitement, however. When in doubt, have your printer show you examples of work done in the past. If it has a quality look, you might want to try colored paper stock or spot color on some of your text.

 

The management consultant Howard Upton warns that three common mistakes can negate the value of a costly brochure:

• Built-in obsolescence. If information in a brochure is too specific, such as listing all your officers or managers or customers, it may be obsolete soon after your order of five thousand copies is delivered. The remedy: design the brochure so that it can be revised easily from time to time without redoing the whole thing.

• Ostentation. Turning the brochure into a tribute to your orga­nization's leader and leading off with a letter or extended quote allegedly from the leader's mouth or typewriter can sink the brochure in a sea of pomposity.

• Awkward format. Designers love to play around with odd di­mensions and strange folds. That may give "visual impact," but it also can necessitate special envelopes for mailing the brochure. And the odd brochure is less likely to be filed and saved.

 

Printer

Since almost every PR practitioner must design print messages, a work­ing acquaintance with typography and printing is helpful.

It is a waste of both your time and the printer's if you have not suf­ficiently thought out what it is you want printed. It helps greatly if you have in hand rough layouts or samples of jobs similar to what you are looking for. On the other hand, the worst approach you can take, unless you have an unlimited budget, is to come to a printer with the job so firmly worked out in your mind that you are totally inflexible. Printers will accommodate you, but it may mean jobbing out parts of the project that they can't handle, and you will pay a premium price.

Contact three or four printers far in advance of the time when the work must be done, and obtain samples of their work. You may find one printer who is already doing jobs similar to what you want, which translates into cost savings. Find out what typesetting and other ser­vices each printer handles in the shop and what has to be sent to an outside supplier. Time is lost and the price increases every time some­thing must be sent outside. The printer may not want to divulge this information, but if you obtain two or three competitive bids, it will show up in disparities between fairly standard items such as typeset­ting and binding.

Be sure to let the printer know if it's a one-shot job or whether you will bring similar work periodically. You may get a better price on re­turn business, especially if the printer can save certain graphic materi­als you intend to reuse.

The printer will need a day or two to work up the bid. Estimating is a fairly exact business, taking into account the normal office and plant overhead that must be apportioned among all the jobs, plus hourly costs of running each piece of machinery involved in your job. It is always useful to ask for a "break-down bid," which indicates how the price differs depending upon the grade of paper, the type of ink, the number of pictures, the multiples of thousands of copies, and the use of spot color. If you have a limited budget, you may have to play off one item against another: Take a better grade of paper and sacrifice the second color of ink, for example.